The Coffee Shop Cry: Lessons In Personal Freedom – Day 339: 365 Radical Self Love Project

Today I got triggered in a big time way.

As the magical universe would have it I was spiritually tested this afternoon to express and dig even deeper to expand my capacity for forgiveness.
radical self love kelsey grant

Inside of this triggering breakdown I had the chance to reach out and ask for support from my partner.

As soon as the trigger was activated, instead of letting it fester, I asked for support and if I could clear something with him that was activating an experience of upset and stress within me. Of course he said yes- he is incredible that way.

We dialogued for about 20 minutes while I cleared what I needed and gave him the stage to contribute his perspective and coaching my way. I let it in and found some peace around my challenge.

Then we headed out to adventure and find a new coffee shop to work in.

When we arrived at the coffee shop we continued our conversation and explored the deeper lessons and reasons why I was so triggered and upset. Inside of this very vulnerable exploration I was overwhelmed with emotion and I teared up.

I cried in the coffee shop

And it was incredibly freeing.

It was a testament to how far I’ve come along my journey. In a big time way I was able to be completely present to what was going on with me and not give a shit about where I was or the fact being gently emotional in public might make me “look bad” to anyone watching.

It didn’t matter because for one of the first times in my life, the exploration and expression of my wellbeing no longer dependant on the level of comfort people around me. My healing and gentle release was top priority. I allowed myself to completely be in my experience without stuffing it down or pretending I wasn’t hurting. I gave myself the freedom to just BE.

radical self love kelsey grant

Years ago I wouldn’t have been caught ever showing emotion in public never mind being vulnerable enough to allow someone into the most intimately sacred parts of myself and courageously outing my insecurities. I would have shut it down immediately and saved it for a more “acceptable” time and place- which in all honesty meant I just wouldn’t deal with it.

This RSL journey has supported me in accessing deep and profound levels of self acceptance through my ever growing understanding and application of self love. My free self expression allowed me to constructively clear what needed to be let go of and created the space for deeper intimacy and connection between my partner and I.

radical self love kelsey grant

I acknowledge my partner for the strength to hold space for me today and within that space anchor in more acceptance, compassion and connection.

I acknowledge myself for the courage it took to be boldly honest and deal with something immediately so that I could find a deeper sense of freedom, forgiveness and self expression.

Passing a spiritual test with grace and compassion = levelling up to the next stage of greatness

Crying and the most raw and authentic self expression in the moment = freedom. Beautiful, pure freedom.

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Because Who Is Perfect?- A Heartwarming Illustration of Self Love and Acceptance- Day 273: 365 Radical Self Love Project

A fellow RSL member shared this video with me this week and I absolutely adored it.

All of us are perfect in our imperfections and the more we remember this on a daily basis the more loving and peaceful we become. To see yourself in another is to see love.

No two bodies are ever the same and while certain industries would like to sell you big time on their ideal of perfection it isn’t exactly attainable. As far as I can see and the truth in my heart leads me to know this is all set up in a very intentional way. If people keep thinking they are not enough, if they keep striving for this so called perfection, their vibes will stay at a level that is bound by fear.

People who are fearful make wonderful consumers. When we feel like there is something missing or wrong with us we often head out on the path of consuming in attempt to fill the void. What there is to get is there is no magic pill or “thing” we can buy that will change whats really going on inside. Buying things is a temporary fix. It gives us an initial rush of feel good hormones and then like a sugar high the energy crashes again- and the cycle continues.

I’m not saying that I’m anti-consumerism or anything like that- I love a great new pair of shoes or an outfit that seems like it was made for me. What I’m saying is we must as a collective attune ourselves to the motives and intentions behind why we buy and what we are investing our money and energy into. Bring a little more consciousness to our commerce.

When we bring more consciousness to the land of consuming and commerce the veil of fears illusion begins to part and we really start to see that we are all imperfect beings, we all have “flaws”, we’ve all made mistakes, we all have something we just don’t dig about ourselves- and inside of all of that we are so divinely perfect.

To see this we must begin to change and the change has to come from within. We must embark on our own spiritual journey to uncover our brilliance, our truth and ultimately our unity.

This video is a beautiful illustration of the diversity among us, the illusion of perfection and some seriously yummy self love and acceptance. The more we see ourselves and each other as perfectly imperfect and the more we being to accept and embrace this eclectic diversity among us the more we open to massive love flow.

Awareness, acceptance and compassion all activate the flooding of love- in ourselves and ultimately in the world.

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Mega Radical Self Love Emerges When Four Women Participate In A Photoshop Experiment: Day 247: 365 Radical Self Love Project

This morning I watched a fabulous video on UpWorthy. This video showcased 4 women who were given model makeovers and how they embraced the final result was astonishing.

We are all constantly bombarded with images and ideals of what it means to be beautiful, feminine and attractive. A lot of women get into the trap of thinking when I look like this I will be happy. And base those ideals on unattainable and unreal representations of reality.

This short video shows the journey of 4 women who when they see the final results of the makeovers and photo shoot have a absolutely incredible Radically Self Loving response.

Watching this was a fabulous reminder to me of how powerful we truly are, and even though these “messages of beauty” that we are constantly exposed to may be powerful it is no match for our inner knowing and the power of Radical Self Love.

Watch and be inspired 🙂


Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Releasing Attachment and Embracing Acceptance: What One Hair Cut Taught Me- Day 173: 365 Radical Self Love Project

This past week has brought a new level of awareness and eventually self acceptance into my experience.

About a week ago I went to go get my hair cut. I’m very particular about my hair and lets just be honest, I’m totally attached to it. It took me five years to grow it out and I have always really loved long hair. So imagine my surprise when my long locks were lying on a pile on the floor below my chair. When something like this happens there really isn’t much to do except eventually get to a place of acceptance via shifting internal perceptions.

What this hair cut taught me:

1. Un-communicated expectations are at the root of many, and most upsets.

I had an expectation of how my hair was going to look, I showed a picture and it turned out very different. Had I communicated how important it was to me to keep the length of my hair, perhaps it would have gone differently, perhaps it wouldn’t. The point though is not my hair, but what my hair brings to my awareness. If I have uncommunicated expecations with a hair cut- I have them all over my life. It is now up to me to discover where these expecations exists and then *GASP* communicate them effectively.

2. Attachment to an outcome is painful.

I was really set on the way it was going to go and when it turned out differently I completely had a meltdown and continued to experience internal conflict-all because I had a very strong attachment to how it should go. Like anything in life what is meant to happen is what does. Everything happens for a reason and when we hold death grips on our expectations we rob ourselves from the opportunity to see what we are being called to learn. There is always a greater and higher reasoning to why things happen the way they do. I can see first hand why having these restrictive attachments is something my higher self was guiding me to release- the more I embrace going with the flow and being clear in my expectations, the more I can actually relax and trust that whatever happens is what is meant to happen for my highest good. This does wonders for the experience of inner peace, happiness, abundance and flow. For True.

3. I am my biggest critic.

This massive change brought up a whole lot of “stuff” about feeling pretty, attractive and sexy. This entire situation has brought to my attention how hard I can be on myself and my physical appearance. What this also really brought to my attention was the fact that until my internal state resonates with the positive feedback I was receiving from others, I will actually reject what is coming at me externally. Meaning every single person I have come into contact with since getting the hair cut has affirmed just how amazing it actually looks- I couldn’t accept their praise as the truth simply because that was not what I believed inside. It wasn’t until today when I fully embranced, accepted and could see the beauty of it that I could really take in the positive feedback externally as truth.

4. The things that trigger an upset are not actually what we are upset about.

WHHHAAAT??!!! Yup it’s true, while I’ve known this for quite some time this entire experience drove the lesson home even more. I was triggered into an upset by my hair cut. Deep down what I was actually upset with was much different. The hair cut was just the surface trigger point to lead me to a deeper understanding of myself and the profound richness of my being. It was really about: my levels of self acceptance, my communication skills and my self perceptions. I have learned through this experience to see myself as beautiful no matter what, to accept myself as a beautiful and attractive woman inside and out, to level up my communication, learn how to communicate my expectations clearly, and how to allow the positive feedback from the outside guide me towards developing a more positive and loving relationship with myself.

Radical Self Love Kelsey Grant

So all things considered this was indeed one of the best hair cuts I have ever received, because it was so much more than a change in physical appearance. It inspired the transformation of my self acceptance, my body acceptance, my body love and ultimately my self love. This is a win, a really big one 😉

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Feature Friday: Soul Sister Style-Day 168: 365 Radical Self Love Project

It’s Feature Friday!!!

radical self love kelsey grantToday I’m taking this spotlight time to shine some much deserved attention and energy to my incredible girlfriends!!!

This week has been an amazing time of re-connection, new connections and soul connections. I am so incredibly grateful for the calibre of women I have now created in my life. I am so blessed to have an abundance of smart, funny, beautiful, powerful, gentle, feminine Goddesses in my circle of influence.

radical self love kelsey grant

Each of the women I have close to me embody a beautiful quality and equally beautiful contribution to this world. I feel so blessed to share my life and my loves with these fabulous goddess angel women.

radical self love kelsey grantIt wasn’t always this way. For a long time I didn’t trust women. As a young girl I learned girls are fickle, they will turn on you in an instant and ultimately cast you out when you think you belong. Little did I know in my younger years this contrast was leading me to the precious lesson of SELF ACCEPTANCE.

The more I began to accept myself and own all the beautiful qualities about me my circle of friends began to shift. I was no longer attracting surface level friendships which were more based on outer appearances and looking good- and was now attracting deep, fulfilling soul connections, where there was space for everyone’s brilliance and each and every one of the women in my life represented something gorgeous about the divine feminine.

radical self love kelsey grantNow as I have really grown into my own skin, learned to love me, and am constantly levelling up to greater domains of self acceptance my girlfriends are a true reflection of the inner transformation which has taken place.

This week I have been so blessed to unite my energy with new friends who are clearly soul sistas, and with my ever incredible circle of Goddesses who are absolutely brilliant and beautiful in every way, shape and form.

radical self love kelsey grant

radical self love kelsey grantToday I honour you ladies. Thank you for showing up, thank you for all you do to beam greatness into this world and thank you for being the space for my brilliance to shine. You are so incredibly valued and I am honestly over the moon with how amazing each and every one of you are.

radical self love kelsey grantThis week has been such an example to me of the power women have when we unite in love. We are such gentle and loving beings and we all deserve to have friends who reflect this to us. The key is showing up that way for ourselves first. The more loving I became within, the more love I experienced outside of myself aka in my friendships.

Ladies I am truly honoured to be on this journey with you, my heart is happy because you are all in it.

With deep love and gratitude for the Goddess-Soul-Sistahs in my world! 

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

KG
#radicalselflove #goddesses #girlfriends #soulsisters

Burlesque, Body Love and 4 Steps For Full On Self Acceptance- Day 156: 365 Radical Self Love Project

As some of you may know I am a former burlesque performer.

About one month after moving cities nearly 5 years ago I had decided I wanted to learn burlesque and get back into the world of stage performing.

Kelsey Grant Radical Self LoveMy sexuality and personal acceptance of my body were the main themes I was working through at the time and burlesque was my outlet. I chose the route of broadway burlesque which is more or less cabaret style performing. It’s sensual, technical and requires confidence and full on body love.

I trained for a couple months until I felt comfortable getting out into the performing world again and rocking out in my incredible red sequin bra and deliciously yummy costumes. Performing in this manor helped me get back in touch with a part of me I had long been suppressing- my sexual self.

After being in a 3.5 year relationship where all things sexual were kept behind closed doors and appearances were everything, I was feeling less than connected to myself and such a huge part of my being- my sexuality, my feminine energy and the divine sensuality that flows through us all if we allow it.

Even though the style of burlesque I was rockin didn’t require the taking off of clothes, it still required getting on stage, in an incredibly sexy costume, dancing in high heals and exuding confidence and full acceptance of myself, my body and my talents. I’m an incredibly skilled performer, singing and dancing have always come naturally to me. So infusing an area of life I wanted to expand and empower myself in (sexuality) with my natural areas of talent (singing and dancing) made this exploration much easier and fulfilling.

Consistency and repetition = keys to success

radical self love kelsey grantThe more I practiced the better dancer I became. The more I got used to seeing my beautiful body move in the reflection of the mirror in class- to the sensual rhythms of the music the more in touch I got with my inner goddess, my sexual self and the awareness of how important it is for me to have a balanced and positive relationship to my body, my sexuality and my areas of talent.

It took all the courage I had to get on stage some nights but I did it. I felt the fear and I stepped right into it. From this bold action I ended up creating and leading my own burlesque troupe for over a year- who performed original cabaret style numbers, choreographed by me and one of the lead dancers- all for charity. We only performed for charitable events in Vancouver which gave us all a sense of purpose, contribution and self expression.

This morning I saw a video that brought all of this back into my awareness.

When I saw the following video this morning it reminded me of

  • How far I have come on my self love and self acceptance journey
  • How many women, and men, deal often in silence and alone with the pressures to accept their bodies

love-your-body-12

I absolutely love the bold, fierce and courageous message within this video and within this beautiful woman. At some point we have to take our power back and begin reclaiming our self worth. It can be a challenge when surrounded by a bazillion messages every day attempting to program what is beautiful, what a perfect body looks like and how far away most people are from this unrealistic idea.

 

Love yourself just as you are. You are beautiful no matter what your size.

We are all so quick to judge each other and even quicker to judge ourselves. If we ever wish to live in a world where we don’t criticize, judge and attack each other we first have to learn how to positively acknowledge, accept and uplift ourselves. This begins with our internal dialogue. We must learn how to become more kind and loving in the things we say to ourselves.

love-your-body-cover

Four Focus’s to Increase Body Love and Self Acceptance RSL Style

  1. When we look in the mirror we must train ourselves to focus on the things we love about our bodies.
  2. We must learn to seek out our strengths and enhance those qualities and allow them to be expressed more openly.
  3. When we create our lives we must train ourselves to invest time and energy into keeping ourselves healthy and high vibin- this includes making time for exercise, healthy food prep and a spiritual practice of meditation and gratitude cultivation.
  4. We have to train ourselves to seek beauty, joy and love- in everything we do, in every one we meet and in every circumstance we find ourselves in.

It is when we begin to define ourselves by who we are, what we stand for and the contribution we bring to this world- we will begin to witness a world characterized by love.

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

How I Get to Know Myself More Through the Reflection of Others Day 63: RSL Project

images-4What we see in others is a reflection of what is already within us.

This theme has been popping up in a couple different conversations over the past few days. I feel it is a very important RSL concept to share considering the whole RSL journey is about turning inward and loving ourselves. We do this by getting to know who we truly are in ways we have not yet experienced.

If a certain quality within someone else did not already exist within us we would not be capable of recognizing it. We can only recognize and either resist or make agreement with that which we know on a deep level.

the-world-is-what-you-are

This knowing is often unconscious until we have an ahhhh haa! moment otherwise known as a breakthrough.

I have found it to be way easier to integrate this awareness when it applies to a quality I like in another and I’ve found it a little more challenging when I am faced with a person I’m really not diggin.

The thing is every single person, interaction and experience I have is reflecting back to me that which I am giving off and that which is deep within, sometimes beyond my conscious awareness. This makes life a truly fun and curious adventure.

MenopauseCoachWhen I can direct my focus to this understanding the entire day turns into a lil research project, in which I get to dive into who I really am and learn myself in deeper more profound ways. When I see things I don’t like about others I first have to acknowledge it exists within me somewhere, somehow, do a little soul searching to find how I manifest the same qualities and then choose to consciously direct my behaviour/ course correct to be in alignment with that which I actually want and who I want to be.

The best example is when I experience someone speaking in a really rude or condenceding way. While it is very rare that I outwardly speak or behave that way anymore, what it brings into my awareness is, even though I don’t speak to others that way, I sometimes speak to myself that way. Which dear friends is a habit which has to shift inorder for my levels of RSL to expand and for me to become more and more on purpose.

My invitation is simple friends: take time every day to be the observer of your waking day to day life. Practice one day at a time finding the correlation of your daily interactions with an internal belief or pattern you express in your life. Simple. When you get super real with yourself your experience of being alive becomes way more magical and precious. I promise 😉

imgres-1

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

What Obstacals Teach Us About Freedom and Self Awareness! Day 60: 365 RSL Project

” Freedom is not overcoming what you think stands in your way. It is understanding that what is in your way is part of the way”.

On the journey of Radical Self Love we run into thoughts, feelings, circumstances and people who we perceive to be standing in our way of success, love, freedom, happiness, or whatever it is we are seeking.

What if I told you that those roadblocks are actually meant to be there.

Wait whaaaaaat?!!

love-is-freedomYup it’s true. The elements of our experience which we believe should not be there, we think are a nuisance, or all the ‘things’ stopping us from achieving and actualizing our potential are there for a substantial reason. They are there to increase our internal awareness of self. If we can get to the place of understanding that all things we face are part of the journey for our highest good we will truly begin to feel what it is truly like to experience freedom. The universe wants us to be full on bliss love balls and clearing out all the shit that no longer serves is the quickest way to return to the truth of our being which is that of a beautiful, bright, sparkly love being.

Self Awareness = Freedom and lets face it Freedom ROCKS!

When we become increasingly more self aware we can start to notice the hidden gifts inside of all we resist. We don’t get to know the light without knowing what darkness is. I certainly wouldn’t have got to this place of teaching Radical Self Love if I didn’t have a reference point to what Radical Self Love wasn’t.

All the challenges I’ve faced and will continue to face are an indication to me that I am growing and evolving. We only are only ever given that which we are capable of handling. Inside of all my coaching and teaching programs this is a HUGE piece we focus on. To really understand that circumstances in life only appear when we are able to successfully handle them is incredibly empowering. I know the ‘problems’ I face now sometimes seem insurmountable at first glance. At second review I am now able to see them as an opportunity to grow and truly succeed.

15979181017_454987901178355_762912098_n

When it comes to romantic love and self love, implementing this concept can really skyrocket our relationships to beautifully delicious and wonderful spaces of divine connection.

I graciously invite you to do some reflection today. What have you been perceiving as “in your way” that actually is the access point to your way? Feel free to share with us what treasures you find!

If you are looking for a more in depth exploration of this entire concept join us for our first RSL Workshop later this month! Details here: RSL Workshop #1

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels