Asking For What You Need IS Part Of The Path Of Love- Day 291: 365 Radical Self Love Project

The lessons just keep coming and it’s perfect.

As I shared a few days ago my partner and I celebrated a pretty fantastical milestone. If you missed it you can read about it HERE.

Over the past couple days I’ve been present to a few things. First being that it is so easy to get caught up in comparing our lives with what we think we know about someone else’s. When we slip into this ego trap we are comparing our lives, with all our beautiful and not so beautiful pieces, to an INTERPRETATION or PERCEPTION of what we THINK another persons life is- not the actual reality of it.

This is very true when it comes to looking at role models or leaders in our lives. The truth of the matter is EVERYONE has shit they gotta deal with and even the most distinguished and incredible leaders still have to deal with the lifeyness of life. No one has a picture perfect life- we all have challenges and we all have wins.

The second thing I’ve been present to is how much of the journey is really about claiming what we need moment to moment and conjuring up the courage to ask for what we need.

path-of-love3

This showed up in my relationship BIG time these past few days.

Even though we achieved a significant and incredible milestone it hasn’t been all sunshine and rainbows. We’ve had to work through some dark ass shit this week. Ultimately leading us to the place where I was able to really get clear on what I needed and ask for it.

At this stage of our relationship I’m really feeling the need for a little re-assurance and external validation from him. While I know he shows me love in many different ways there was still a major disconnect- I wasn’t pickin up what he was throwing down so to speak.

So we dove in.

We stood head on in the face of both our shadows and called for the greater parts of ourselves. The parts that were capable of understanding one another. The parts of us that are pure, divine and sacred.

This took some time but over the course of a few conversations we were finally really understanding each other. We came to the realization that right now the most effective means for him to communicate his love to me in a way that makes sense to me is through words of affirmation.

The outcome:

I awoke to one of the most beautiful written notes he has ever given me AND certainly the most love filled note I have ever received from a partner. The second I read it my entire body and being relaxed, I settled into the massive beam of love and affection he had just sent my way and I allowed myself not only to receive it fully but completely surrender into the bliss of the gift.

The lesson:

Not only is it completely OK to ask for what you need, it is a requirement for our path and our healing. It is also completely OK if from time to time you need outside reassurance and validation during this path. It can get intense and if we have the courage to ask for what we honestly need (while still doing the work to fill ourselves up in the self love department) we will always be blessed with the abundant gifts of the Universe and most likely we will start to see a side of the human condition that is soft, kind and downright incredible.

Give yourself permission to really OWN what you need right now, trusting that it may very well change in the future but for now it is what you need- and it’s all perfect.

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

 

Lessons of a 21 Day Yoga Challenge- Day 274: 365 Radical Self Love Project

Yesterday marked the completion of the 21 day yoga challenge.

I did not complete it as designed and I am totally ok with it.

Here is why:

During this challenge I was brought face to face with something within myself- my ego’s desire to look good. It became very clear to me that my major intention for doing this challenge was to prove to myself I could do it because doing it would make me look good to others in my life.

gentleWell thats all fine and dandy if I had made the choice while taking into consideration of all my other life commitments I had going on at the same time too- AND taking into consideration if the classes offered at the studio would actually harmoniously fit into my jammed schedule. Turns out they didn’t.

For the first week I really stressed myself out to get to yoga- completely anti-yoga- I know, I know 😉

The second week I loosened the reigns on myself and my egos super tight “looking good” grip.

I tuned into what my body actually needed.

I gave myself permission to be flexible, creative and honour my needs

6 Days straight of hot yoga, 1 hot yin class and 1 meditation a week just weren’t working for my body. It was too intense. My schedule didn’t really jive with the studio schedule and the hot classes were pretty much all I could make happen.

When I tuned into what my body wanted everything changed.
  • One day my body was craving a run- so instead of stressing to get to the studio I put on my runners and ran the seawall and enjoyed every second of it.
  • Other days my body craved meditation sessions- so I would load myself up with crystals and zen out in my living room.
  • And other days I made it to my mat in the studio.

I lost track of the amount of classes I took and there were days when I showed up for class and actually forgot about putting a star on the wall chart.

What I “got” about that was it was no longer about the recognition or putting a sticker on the wall (aka listening to the intensity of my ego) it was now about listening to my intuition, my body and my heart. I let my heart guide me day to day to the exact situation that would be best for me in the moment.

I’m so happy I did the challenge because it gave me even deeper perspective, a clearer understanding of my ego and the opportunity to surrender into my path and make the incredible call of what honestly works best for me.

Next time there is a yoga challenge I’ll be sure to put more thought and intention into whether I can honestly make it work or not. Until then I have a wonderful new practice of getting to practice 4-5 times a week. Perhaps that was part of the learning and lesson too 😉

Back to the mat and back to my heart ❤

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Because Who Is Perfect?- A Heartwarming Illustration of Self Love and Acceptance- Day 273: 365 Radical Self Love Project

A fellow RSL member shared this video with me this week and I absolutely adored it.

All of us are perfect in our imperfections and the more we remember this on a daily basis the more loving and peaceful we become. To see yourself in another is to see love.

No two bodies are ever the same and while certain industries would like to sell you big time on their ideal of perfection it isn’t exactly attainable. As far as I can see and the truth in my heart leads me to know this is all set up in a very intentional way. If people keep thinking they are not enough, if they keep striving for this so called perfection, their vibes will stay at a level that is bound by fear.

People who are fearful make wonderful consumers. When we feel like there is something missing or wrong with us we often head out on the path of consuming in attempt to fill the void. What there is to get is there is no magic pill or “thing” we can buy that will change whats really going on inside. Buying things is a temporary fix. It gives us an initial rush of feel good hormones and then like a sugar high the energy crashes again- and the cycle continues.

I’m not saying that I’m anti-consumerism or anything like that- I love a great new pair of shoes or an outfit that seems like it was made for me. What I’m saying is we must as a collective attune ourselves to the motives and intentions behind why we buy and what we are investing our money and energy into. Bring a little more consciousness to our commerce.

When we bring more consciousness to the land of consuming and commerce the veil of fears illusion begins to part and we really start to see that we are all imperfect beings, we all have “flaws”, we’ve all made mistakes, we all have something we just don’t dig about ourselves- and inside of all of that we are so divinely perfect.

To see this we must begin to change and the change has to come from within. We must embark on our own spiritual journey to uncover our brilliance, our truth and ultimately our unity.

This video is a beautiful illustration of the diversity among us, the illusion of perfection and some seriously yummy self love and acceptance. The more we see ourselves and each other as perfectly imperfect and the more we being to accept and embrace this eclectic diversity among us the more we open to massive love flow.

Awareness, acceptance and compassion all activate the flooding of love- in ourselves and ultimately in the world.

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Selecting The Right Relationship- Day 271: 365 Radical Self Love Project

A good friend of mine passed along this talk not too long ago. I finally had the chance to watch it today as I finished up my prep for tonights session of the RSL Relationship Course and thought it was pretty fantastical and wanted to share it with you lovers!

There are some really valid points in this talk and one of the big take aways for me was listening to the guidance of those who are the most honest with you. Often they can see red flags before the brain in love can. I know my life certainly would have been very different if I had listened to the advice of those around me.

Ultimately though I believe everything that happens is the perfect thing to happen and those were my lessons to learn, but hey if there is a route to the path of least resistance I’m all for taking that route and learning the lessons in a slightly more comfortable way 😉

Enjoy!!

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Why Relationships Bring Out Our Shadow- Day 269: 365 Radical Self Love Project

“Demons”- Imagine Dragons

I’ve had this jam on all weekend.

When I find something I like I consume it big time especially when it comes to music.

What I particularily like about this rendition of “Demons” originally by Imagine Dragons but performed here by Kina Grannis and Tyler Ward, is the beautiful blending and harmony of two incredible voices, the originality of the musical arrangement and the deep feeling both of them are emoting through their performance.

Embracing the shadow in love

As I’ve been embracing elements of my shadow this week in relation to my relationship this song really resonates. We all have “demons” and they are all hidden within the corners of our mind, body and soul. When we find ourselves in relationships there is often a time when when our shit starts to surface.

At the start of a relationship we are pretty open, we are in the bliss of love and our hearts are blasted right open. Then something happens. We start to change. Things become more challenging- our shadows begin to emerge.

The beautiful spiritual purpose of intimate relationships is to evolve, transform and open to our truth. How do we get there? We gotta go through the shit. All the crap we have accumulated over a lifetime of believing in fear or at least making agreement with it. We gotta undo all of it. The more we undo the higher we fly- the freer we become.

The purpose of intimate love is to set us free- free from the illusions of our ego and into the bliss of our hearts the bliss of love.

To experience love in its purest forms and in all its glory we must become aware of all the blocks we have to love and then consciously do the work to dissolve them. We have to heal ourselves. We have to let love in.

Romantic relationships are the greatest access point to our healing.

They will open us, crack us open and then shine the spotlight into those deep dark corners of our being. Our shadow will be called out. At first if we are unaware it will seem like the relationship is falling apart and beliefs like “love shouldn’t be this hard” or “love is supposed to be easy” are what keep us trapped in the illusion.

What we are being called towards every single time shit hits the fan in love is to go within. Look at what part of our shadow is wanting to be made seen. What “demon” is ready to be let go of.

Why this happens in relationships

Because it is only in the energy of love that we can truly heal these elements of our being. When our hearts are deeply connected to another there is an opening to the divine. There is an exchange of love’s bliss. It is in this highest vibration that all darkness can be transmuted. In the divinity of intimate relationship we have the chance to dive in, swim to the depths of our being and come out alive. The energy of love is safe. On a soul level we all understand this and so we are drawn into relationships with the exact people who will help us heal the most.

This is why we may have many partners in a lifetime. Each relationship will take us into different layers and levels of who we are. All of it is a beautiful exploration if we let ourselves perceive it that way. Relationships bring out our shadows so we can learn to become greater versions of ourselves, understand fully and lovingly embrace the totality of being.

When we can make friends with our shadow we have passed the soul lesson. We have many shadows and many lessons. So when we bring curiosity, awareness and love into our relationship mix we access infinate potential for massive soul expansion and deep human connection.

Who knew our shadows could bring to us something so beautiful and deeply fulfilling 😉

For more relationship goodness hit me up at rsl@kelseygrant.com as I’m currently working on a new relationship program coming this spring!  If you are interested in going deeper and stepping up your love game lets connect and get the conversation started!!

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Making Time For Love and Dates- Day 268: 365 Radical Self Love Project

Today has been all about Love and Dates.

Self love dates, friendship dates and relationship dates.

I woke up nice and early this morning to hit up a hot yoga class with 2 of my friends. It was such a wonderful way to start the day and a fabulous way to get some friend love and friendship dates in the mix.

Following yoga it was time for a self love date. I hopped into my fav coffee shop, grabbed a coffee and a chocolate croissant and set up shop. I had my book and some paper to journal. I spent time mapping out the next evolution of the business, wrote a 2 hour workshop on relationships and read.

radical self love kelsey grant

After 2.5 solid hours of me time and heart centred creation I met up with my partner.

We had a mini business meeting about his projects, did some creative masterminding and then headed out for our afternoon date.

radical self love kelsey grant

We adventured to a different part of the city, grabbed a coffee, went for a beautiful walk along the beach, had incredible chats about our relationship, how we can strengthen our bond, how we want to grow together, the next chapter of RSL and building this company and the next chapter of our love story. It was amazing.

radical self love kelsey grant

radical self love kelsey grant

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then we went for late afternoon ice cream at this amazing independent shop that just opened recently. Seriously so yummy.

After all of that we made our way home to make an awesome pizza dinner and complete the night with a lil more work/study time then snuggles and movie!

radical self love kelsey grant

Pure purrrrfection.

We have so much time every day to make the most of our lives and fit in all the things that truly matter. The key is clearing the space. When we fill up our lives with shit we don’t really want to do or agree to things that drain our energy more than they contribute or we say yes to hanging with peeps when all we really want is some solo time- we find ourselves on the edge of burnout and breakdown.

You are the only one in the drivers seat of your life. You choose what you say yes to and what you say no to. While it may not always be possible to design each and every day this way- we all have responsibilities and such- it is possible to begin to create more time for ourselves doing what we love.

Start with one afternoon a week. A 2 hour window each week that is purely dedicated to YOU and doing exactly what you want. Then expand it from there! You are completely worth it!!!

If you really want to amp it up and learn how to effectively rock the self love train join us in the 30 Day Radical Self Love Program! It’s designed in such a way where we start to build the muscle of imputing time for ourselves little by little each day so we can really thrive in love and life. Sign up HERE

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Mega Milestone- 200 Days of Blogging Complete! Day 265: 365 Radical Self Love Project

Wow today marks a pretty significant milestone- I’ve been blogging for 200 days straight!!!

With 100 days left to go in this project I’m going to take tonights blog to reflect on the some top personal highlights of this journey so far.

Celebration

1. Blogging every day for the past 200 days has taught me that I am far more capable of taking things on and ROCKING them that I ever thought possible.

2. I can overcome adversity- there were parts of this journey so far where I came up against challenges- technology, internet or just my own internal crap- that would get me stuck. The number one solution: Asking for help. By sharing openly the challenges I was facing peeps showed up with genius ideas and solutions to help me out.

3. I have learned on a new level just how committed, dedicated and consistent I actually am when I am driven by a capacity to serve and share a message of positivity, love and inspiration.

4. It’s made me realize what a friggin awesome writer I am and has given me loads and heaps of solid content to pull from going forward.

5. I’ve learned what a difference my journey is making for others. I receive feedback on the regular thanking me for my vulnerability, my openness and my daily presence of inspiration and love. Knowing that when I show up here to write each day other people are going to be positively impacted really makes my heart happy.

6. And best of all- it has helped me get super comfy being uncomfy. Sharing my vulnerabilities, my life and my journey so openly has helped me really get ok and relax into my role as teacher, coach and mentor. Every time I share on this platform I gain more and more confidence, awareness and clarity into who I truly am and how much the world is craving connection, vulnerability and real human rawness.

It has been a friggin delight and honour to have shared these past 200 days with you lovers and I’m looking forward to what the final 100 days have in store for us!!!

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Vancouver ManTalks- An Epic Success For My Partner And Our Relationship- Day 264: 365 Radical Self Love Project

Well last night it happened- the first ever round of  “ManTalks” took the stage here in Vancouver and it was a brilliant success.

The premise for this event is to support men in establishing communities of fellow high vibin, conscious and awake men.

Women have these networks all over the place- we are natural connectors. It’s now time to support our male friends, partners, brothers, fathers in creating more masculine networks that are based in the vibration of authenticity, vulnerability and real rawness.

Human beings are freaking masters of illusion. We are so good at putting on the “I’m fine- everything is perfect” mask. When we do so we run the risk of loosing the opportunity to truly connect with each other and experience the bliss of human heart connection.

For this connection to happen we gotta let down our guard, we have to allow ourselves to be seen and we have to open up and be vulnerable enough to let the stuff we would rather keep hidden be shared from a place of power, possibility and evolution.

photo 2This is what ManTalks is all about, creating the environment for men to dive into the fabulousness of community, of their vulnerability and ultimately of their humanity. I am so freaking thrilled of how the first event went. The speakers were all incredible and set the tone for a really incredible community to begin to unfold and the opening of such a significant cultural conversation to begin.

I’m so proud of my warrior man who by sharing his truth, his vulnerability and leadership has called this same gift out of some pretty incredible men in this Vancouver community. I also really dig that it’s an open space for women to come to watch and connect with men who are diving in and leading by conscious example.

I think its so easy for us as a collective female gender to formulate stereotypes about men or ideas about their ability to open, be real and be raw. I quite enjoyed the sharing, the stories and the inspiration that came out of each of them and as a woman I am thrilled to watch a community of like minded and like hearted men (and women) take shape.

This is a massive win for our collective human family. One step closer to harmony, unity and ultimate love connection!

photo 3

For all you curious cats here is some info on each of the speakers!

Scott Low

photo 8Co-Founder of FS Financial Strategies. FS is a social conscious financial strategy group that donates $50 to any charity of your choice after a consultation through their Mission of Care program.

Aran Seaman

photo 5Co-Founder of Eartheasy. Eartheasy is an online store for anything and everything sustainable. Their goal is simple:  to encourage, inspire and inform people about the benefits of a simpler, less material lifestyle, and the importance of protecting our natural environment as the source of our well-being.

Wes Baker

photo 4Co-Founder of Debrand. Debrand is an innovative pioneer specializing in secure and responsible recycling solutions for corporate waste. They find unique and environmentally friendly ways to recycle materials while respecting brand protection.

Phillip Mckernan

photo 6Founder of PhilipMckernan.com, a boutique experiential retreat based company dedicated to connecting people to what they love. Best selling author, runs retreats around the world, speaks around the world, work with companies and individuals to help them create a more meaningful life by connecting to the things they love. I work with high level athletes, entrepreneurs, actors, couples and anyone who gets in their own way to real fulfillment.

Connor Beaton

photo 7Founder of ManTalks a platform for men to authentically share their biggest challenges, passions and purpose to inspire the development and like minded and like hearted community. Connor is a leadership and development expert who thrives in the environments of effectively directing people how to lead, inspire and grow their teams in the most on purpose manor. He is a coach and mentor for men who have a desire to positively impact the world through the work they do and the lives they live and the best part he walks the walk and talks the talk. He is a true leader who leads by clear example. His willingness to openly share is vulnerabilities, rawness and masculinity is what makes him a source of authentic inspiration to his community and to this world.

All of the proceeds from last nights event (nearly $600) is being donated to charity. Our charity of choice this time around is Music Heals  we were blessed to have the executive director Chris Brandt join us in the evenings festivities!

photo 1

I am so proud of my partner for putting together this event and taking his vision and making it a reality. His story is one of complete transformation and I know will be a catalyzing force for more men to reclaim their true authentic power and shine in their incredible masculine essence.

There is a massive awakening happening and I am blessed to know my partner and all of these men and women are a massive catalyst for change.

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

B-School- Accountability-High Vibes and Rockin New Directions- Day 263: 365 Radical Self Love Project

Today I had the honour of connecting for the first time over Skype with my B-School accountability partner.

In choosing to do this program as it’s designed I decided to step out of my comfort zone in a big time way and reach out to a fellow B-Schooler that I didn’t know to create this dynamic.

Why oh Why Did I Do This?

doodle-marie-bschool2-308x400Well it’s simple, for me when I have a pre-existing relationship with someone there can be a tendency to play safe on both sides. There is more at stake if a accountability partner who is a close friend calls out a way of being or something we said we would do that we haven’t done. It leaves the space for bruised ego’s and for potential friendship upsets if either party shows up in the friend zone instead of the accountability zone. Basically I want to work with someone who isn’t afraid to call me out if I need it and be incredible supportive at the same time.

I also love the vibe of being with someone I don’t yet know and having the opportunity to create myself as someone who plays BIG, follows through and is a rocking support partner. I also love that I get to create her the exact same way. Double win for both of us!

The dynamic with someone new is comparable to the objectivity that occurs in a coaching session. Full transparency, full accountability and a ear who will listen for greatness.

I made the agreement this morning to show up, play big and always relate to my partner as a woman who is fully capable of achieving everything she sets out to do.

The call was incredible and so inspiring. We are definitely similar in some respects and quite different in others. I love this dynamic because it means there is so much potential for us both to learn from one another.

My B-School accountability partner is a powerhouse. She’s high vibin, driven, authentic, creative, transparent, honest, respectful and such a delight to chat with. I’m seriously so pumped for this new chapter, for this new level of greatness and for the new directions I can already see my business taking. If you wanna check out all the awesomeness she is up to you can do so HERE.

B-School is going to be a wild ride and I’m ready baby!!!

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Conscious, Evolved Men, “ManTalks” And A Pretty Proud Girlfriend!! Day 261: 365 Radical Self Love Project

Yoooooo Vancouver!!!! My very inspiring and incredible partner Mr. Connor Beaton is hosting a pretty rad-tacular event this coming Tuesday.

Before spilling the beans about the event I just gotta say

I am so freaking proud of my man!!!

He has spent the past four months, planning, designing and getting this event ready to rock. It has been such a pleasure watching him step even further into his greatness and begin creating in the direction of his calling. I am honoured to be his partner and when he plays big like this it calls me to step it up too. I love that so much about our relationship and who he is.

I feel like the super gushy, happy, proud, ecstatic girlfriend who is just over the moon about my man. And I totally am that woman. I know this event is just the beginning for him. A start of a brand new chapter filled with all his dreams and ambitions coming true. He is an incredible, evolved, conscious and driven man and I feel so blessed to have him in my life.

Now onto the details:

Its by donation which makes it very accessible for anyone- pay what you can is the motto here.  The proceeds are ALL going to charity and the night is set up with the intention of bringing together a collective of conscious men to begin creating a new type of dialogue hence the event name:

ManTalks.

Radical Self Love Kelsey Grant ManTalks

Event deets: Tuesday March 11th, 7-10 @ ING Direct Cafe (466 Howe St Vancouver).
Reserve your ticket here and choose your donation amount when you register!

Women are welcome to attend as well but the main focus is supporting our masculine pals in having positive, conscious and high vibin men in their lives to learn grow and expand from.

The night will include 4 speakers each of whom have build a fully sustainable and conscious business. All four men highly value community, contribution and have so generously donated their time and expertise to help others who are interested in building a company and a life that truly makes a positive difference in this world.

So if you are one of those high vibin, open minded types I would HIGHLY encourage you to show up and connect with these guys!

As a woman it makes my heart so very happy to see events like this happening. I love knowing there are events and communities like this where guys can go to be real, build positive community networks and mastermind their ideas and learning from other men in such a way where they all continue to grow into their greatest versions. Men who show up this way for their lives leave this world a better place because of who they are being and the true contribution they are.

More conscious men + more conscious women = beauty, harmony and sustainable positive world change.

Be a part of the movement.

See you Tuesday!!

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels