Stop Shoulding on Yourself and Get Into Divine Harmony In Love- Day 239: 365 Radical Self Love Project

Dropping the should and entering the world of relationship harmony and inner peace.

Something I am really present to tonight is how truly powerful we each are in creating our experience of being alive.

Couple Meditating at Spa

As I pondered what the relationship post would be for tonight it struck me in a wave of life synchronicity. I was driving to pick up my partner from his course tonight and the stream of consciousness began. The topic of “should” had come up in my meeting tonight and it got me pondering:

Who would I be without my story of how it should be?

I would be at peace, I would be present and I would be in flow.

With this answer in mind I began reflecting on a situation from today. This afternoon I sent my man a beautiful note of appreciation and gratitude. He responded with a lovely text and only moments after reading it the “shoulding” began.

I without conscious thought began casting judgement on his response and convincing myself that he didn’t mean what he said and that his response was robotic and detached.

Then I caught it.

I turned it around on myself.

I asked myself, “where in our relationship had I responded to a kind gesture with a lack of enthusiasm or more accurately from a space of withholding the depth of my gratitude?”

Why it had just happened yesterday.

He showered me with the gift of a beautiful card and I could barely capture any other words but thank you. I was deeply moved and felt so connected but I kept that to myself for fear of looking silly or over emotional. I didn’t own my truth and I certainly didn’t communicate to him how deeply grateful I was for that gesture.

Next reflection how could I see this differently? What would it be like if I knew his response was enough?

As I drove, I began telling myself a different story about his response:

“It was loving”

“It was honest”

“He responded in the most authentic way possible given the circumstances of his night” (he was on a day long seminar).

As I repeated these new stories to myself on my drive the next light ahead would turn green. I had no stops, no roadblocks no obstacles to interrupt my flow the entire drive there.

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It was a beautiful lesson which couldn’t have been more perfect.

When we dwell in the best case scenario we open up to divine flow, life becomes easy, simple, fun, exciting and best of all it feels good.

The universe spoke to me in the form of traffic lights. With every positive creation I made the light turned green- I was in flow.

By the time I arrived at the destination I felt at peace, present and super connected to the blessing and divine gift he is in my life. Pretty freaking magical.

What and who would you be without the disempowering story?

Let yourself go there. Dwell in that creation that all best case outcomes are possible and more importantly the best case scenario is your reality. For what we think we create.

Dropping the shoulding and picking up the positive creation feels oh so gooooood and darling beauty you are incredibly worth it all.

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

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Love, Nail Art and Desire Mapping: A Day In The Life of a Radical Self Lover- 232: 365 Radical Self Love Project

Life is magical and full of miracles, abundance and beauty if we are open to seeing it.

A day in the life of a radical self lover

This morning I awoke to a beautiful offering to receive a lil pampering and have my nails done with some beautiful Valentines goodness. What a wonderful way to start the day!!

Before heading out to my nail appointment I met up with a precious girlfriend caught up, shared insights and vibed high on the amazingness of life. So grateful for friends like these. In this conversation she helped me to remember to see the beauty in entirety of the process of birthing a company, programs and products into the world. She reminded me of the incredibleness of celebrating the small successes. It is when we celebrate these little achievements we are lead to bigger and bolder wins. Solid reminder. I am blessed.

1902837_10153849790480145_1516216145_nNext onto the nail appointment. Full on Valentines/love nail art accompanied by some high vibin love filled conversations. Laura is a ROCKSTAR and if you want a top quality mani or pedi she is the woman. So grateful to Frilly Lilly for the gift of this mornings pampering. You ladies are such a blessing.

Then back home for an afternoon of meditation, reading, researching and developing course material for our up and coming RSL Relationship Course! I absolutely LOVE this content and I am so freaking stoked to kick off a 9 week journey of self love, relationships and rocking the high vibin- success- love filled- relationship train with our incredible Radical Self Lovers!

There is still time to apply to join us! If you are interested in more details of the program and want to learn how to either attract the relationship you are actually worthy of or interested in learning how to enhanse and create more flow and harmony in your relationship hit me up and lets chat! Send me an email @ rsl@kelseygrant.com for more course details. We’re rocking the webinar style classroom so all of you beauties around the globe can join in if it feels aligned for you! xo

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Next on the day’s agenda I’m heading to session 1 of our Desire Map book club with a community of incredible peeps who are committed to bringing more love, light and awesomeness into their lives and into the world. YEAAAA budday!!

And to complete this beauty of a day I’ll be meeting up with the love of my life to enjoy a later date night, some dinner and some incredible connection time.

My life is blessed.

Beaming loads of love, joy, blessings and happiness to each and every one of you lovers xoxo

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Three Valuable Lessons My Coach Taught Me Today- Day 209: 365 Radical Self Love Project

I love Thursdays

Thursdays are my coaching days. They kick off with my amazing coaching session with my coach and then I rock client sessions throughout the day.

Why I have a coach

What makes me an effective coach, leader and facilitator is my willingness to be coached and teachable. I know enough to know I don’t know everything. I am like anyone else who signs up for coaching. I have a life that sometimes gets lifey. I experience contrast, breakdowns and challenges. I am effective at what I do because I allow myself the space to work through my stuff and clear my shit in respectful and constructive ways.

My coach reminded me of three very valuable lessons today:

radical self love1. There are some people who by nature seek drama and it is not a life requirement to get pulled into their shit-storm.

2. Conflict can only arise when there is a lack of clarity.

3. When dealing with conflict, breakdown and emotions there is always room for possibility and the opportunity of a breakthrough.

While we may write certain people off in our lives because they are challenging we must keep in mind that those people are brought into our lives for a very important reason. They are always brought into our lives to help us overcome our own limitations and internal conflict. While they may present this opportunity it is important to note it is not required to keep them in our lives. Sometimes we just have to bless people, wish them the best and set them free.

What we see in others means nothing about them and everything about us.

We-do-not-see-things-as-they-are-we-see-things-as-we-areOur model of the world is based on our own personal life experience. No two people experience life the same and there for no two people will share the same perspectives and interpretations of life’s events. What occurs to one person as peaceful occurs to another as an attack and it is all rooted in our perceptions of the world. Some people just have a lens of drama. They unconsciously seek it and perpetuate it.

We either believe we live in a hostile universe where everyone and everything is out to “get” us or we believe we live in a kind and loving Universe where everyone and everything exists to help us grow, understand and come more into alignment with our truth. When we believe the world is out to get us we act in such a way to ensure we are “right” about it. Meaning we leave a lot of grey room in our communication, in our actions and in our behaviour. Lack of clarity is the ideal breeding grounds for conflict. This is why clear agreements and the management of details plays such a vital role in our ability to thrive and experience possibility.

Clarity is the foundation in which possibility is built on.

When we have a solid foundation we minimize the opportunity and space for breakdowns with each other. However when breakdowns do occur, and they do for all of us. What there is to understand is we all have the opportunity to handle them in a respectful and  constructive manor.  One of the foundational pieces of coming into harmonious resolutions is this: before launching into coaching mode or giving feedback mode create the space for possibility and have their agreement.

This means setting the conversation or context up in such a way where you allow the other person to freely choose what is best for them at this point in time. Most people just spew their breakdown, go on the attack and then wonder why the person on the other end is not receptive.

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What we can do to shift this is simply ask permission.

WayneDyerQuote1Get their buy in. When you have something you need to share, before you share, ask them if they are open and willing to hear what you have to say right now and have the conversation. This one simple step sets you both up to win.

It ensures you will only have the conversation when both parties are open, willing and receptive to feedback. Until that happens we leave the space for more upset, more conflict and no resolution.

It certainly takes courage and a higher level of self awareness to operate this way- and it is totally worth it. Communication that is clear, honest and constructive is always the way to go. When you respect another by allowing them the space to choose when is the best/most optimal time to have the convo you are already on the path to success.

Harmony in breakdowns comes from a willingness to see things differently. Willingness to forgive. Willingness to learn. Willingness to grow and most importantly willingness to love. 

Choose love lovers- it just feels better 😉

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Say What You Need to Say- A Lesson in Love- Day 164: 365 Radical Self Love Project

Say what you need to say has absolutely been the theme of the day.

radical self love kelsey grantDuring my time away this weekend I had pockets of time carved out for learning and personal development, as doing so ensures my happiness and fulfillment.

The theme of what kept coming to me this weekend in all my course material, in my books and in my meditation/reflections was this:

“You have to say what has been given to you to say. The words you are gifted with are rooted in love and when you speak your truth the world opens up”.

Powerful stuff.

This afternoon I got an opportunity to put it into action inside of a lengthy conversation. This conversation was a gift to both parties. By saying what was there to be said it allowed a massive flow of possibility and expansion to flood in to both of us. It got the creative vibrations rocking allowing us individually to fuel our respective endeavours AND clearing the weight of a false belief that was so obviously (to me on the outside) in the way.

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It also brought my awareness to my effective abilities as a coach and healer. If we see things that others can’t in the moment and don’t say anything we rip them off from experiencing a miracle and we rip ourselves off from the healing the miracle generates for both people. I became very present to the fact I now longer am riddled by the paralyzing belief of wanting people to like me and gaining their approval. I am more concerned with the transformation of consciousness and serving a higher purpose. To be a messenger of love means saying things that others won’t AND saying what others won’t from a place of loving detachment.

radical self love kelsey grantSpeaking with love is the key here. A lot of people speak their minds without being connected to their hearts. This more often than not invokes more of an ego battle in both people and in a space of agitation and aggravation healing and miracles can’t exist. To speak through the heart means it needs to be open, it needs to be active and it needs to be committed to the higher good for ALL. It means bringing awareness to the blind-spot without attacking but with acceptance, without demeaning but with compassion, without aggression but with peace. This is the gift I have been given on my earthly journey, to say the things that very much need to be said for any hope of positive shifting internally and externally, and to say them with compassion, openness, acceptance and love.

My invitation to you all tonight is simple- willingly choose to speak your truth and speak it through the heart. Speak your truth through love. If you are unsure what that would sound like you are in the perfect place. It is not you who will be doing the speaking, you will not need to think of what to say, your higher self is the energy that will be speaking through your vessel. This happens when we bring our awareness to the present moment and surrender our will to the will of a higher nature, the will of love. Go ahead and ask your higher self for help, that’s what it’s there for. Ask your higher self to speak through you and that all words, intentions and vibrations come only from love. Then be present, allow and watch the miracle unfold.

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There is so much power in saying the things that will be uncomfortable in the moment but will ultimately lead you both towards your highest potentials. Quite a beautiful gift to each other and the world don’t ya think? 😉

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

How Lists Keep Me Sane and On Purpose- Day 88: 365 Radical Self Love Project

Sometimes we all need a little reminder to stay on point.

Today I wrote out a list of 20 Things I Want to Remember to do Each Day to Really Rock Life. This list is ever evolving because I am ever evolving.  The reason why I wrote it down and put it in a place where I can see it is:

so I actually do it

I wrote in such a way that when I read it it sounds like I’m talking directly to myself. Its kind, compassionate and the gentle nudge I sometimes require to stay on the ball with everything. I know there are things I will forget to do, which in the past have had a massive impact on my success. By making them present to myself each day I have no real reason to drop the ball.

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Writing things out also helps me feel grounded, I feel like my thoughts are all in one place. Some people do really well with virtual organization tools and I prefer the good old paper and pen route. I’ve learned myself well enough to know what really works for me. I could expend copious amounts of time and energy ‘trying’ to change the way I am and force it to be a perceived  ‘better’ or ‘more efficient’ way OR I can own who I am, accept the ways in which I best process information aka thrive and flow and simply act in alignment.

Kelsey Grant radical self loveHere is the thing. Contrary to what you may think or have been told, YOU and only YOU know deep down what is best for you. I as a coach I have learned I can only offer possible alternatives and perspectives to enhance a clients experience of flow. When it comes down to it though, it is you who makes the final call of what is best for you and your life. In my experience there isn’t ever a one size fits all model that works for success, productivity and ultimately life.

 

 

Kelsey Grant radical self loveWe all have unique paths, with our own set of hidden talents, present strengths and areas of growth and expansion. The more time we spend resisting how we are the more time we spend feeling unhappy, unfulfilled and experiencing contrast. When you get real with yourself about who you are, how you operate and what you need, life becomes a lot more enjoyable. From there you are able to design your life and the way you go through it to be in harmony with your strengths and areas of challenge.

 

 

I’m giving up questioning/ second guessing myself and instead I’m claiming ownership of my life and my experience. To be a beacon of inspiration and light I know I must stay in alignment with my heart. This means doing life in a way that makes sense to me and not always will it please or make sense to others. To be perfectly frank I am not here to people please, I am here to be an example of love, inspiration and intimacy. I can only do this when I am in alignment with my truth.

This doesn’t mean I think I know everything and stop learning and being open to change. Quite the contrary. I am a student of life and I will always be learning, growing and evolving. I will definitely come across tools which will make my experience flow even more seamlessly and I am committed to integrating the tools that feel right in my heart and are in alignment with who I am. These types of tools  will always allow me to maintain my personal integrity and knowing of what’s right for me while assisting me in fine tuning my systems, processes and abilities. So here is my list for you lovers to see, be inspired by and model if you feel so inclined! Sharing is caring after all!

To Really Rock It Remember to Do These Everyday:

  1. Gratitude
  2. Meditate
  3. Learn something new (minimum 1hr)
  4. Schedule FB post for RSL
  5. Blog for RSL
  6. Check RSL email
  7. Respond to any and all messages in the FB inbox/email inbox
  8. Take time for you
  9. Laugh
  10. Smooch and love all over your man. Make sure he knows how much he’s loved
  11. Create something new
  12. Day dream
  13. Act on the guidance you are given
  14. Hydrate
  15. Remember to eat and eat well
  16. Give yourself credit for your accomplishments
  17. Write down your appointments and committments
  18. Be kind
  19. Smile. Smiling at strangers gets more points
  20. Move your body- walking, yoga, sex, gym- any type of exercise will do just do something active

There you have it lovers. My daily list.

If you are ready to take the plunge and start rocking full control over your life feel free to check out our RSL workshop this month. We have a live event and a virtual option. This month we are diving into the theme “Getting Unstuck- How to Really Rock It When Sh*t Hits the Fan”. BAM!!! Lets doooooo this! We are in this together and it’s time for all of us to be free, get our love on and have some fun with life!!!

Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!

Kels

Day 6: 365 RSL Project

Harmonious communication and energy exchanges between myself and others has always been an ongoing learning for me. I have learned my biggest lessons in effective communication through contrasting experiences. In other words I learned what to do from doing things that didn’t work so well.

Here are some musings from my heart to yours:

If you relate to someone in a way that only allows them to engage in lower vibrational actions and conversations, that is exactly what you are going to get. In other words, this type of behavioural pattern, creates, with the expectation of experiencing reactions and confrontation.

Alternatively, if you give someone the opportunity to understand they will. This type of engagement requires courage, understanding, compassion, openness and the awareness to consciously choose operating from a higher vibrational vantage point. People will rise to meet our positive expectations if we allow them to.

Relating to others as their greatness starts with being responsible for creating constructive energy, empowering conversational dynamics and respectful actions with one another.

Only Love ❤

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