Challenges are soul tests- if we choose to see them this way.
Last night right before the energies of the lunar eclipse kicked into full swing I was given a soul test. Around 8:45 I over heard a conversation my partner was having about our relationship and his recall of what had transpired.
One little phrase of what he said triggered me, and triggered me deeply.
Knowing that the eclipses are opportunities to plant new seeds of being I knew I was being handed this “gem” from the Universe to see how far I had truly progressed in the past six months. The position of the eclipse was especially significant for me and my astrological chart.
For the past six months I have been working on my relationship stuff and really going deep within to resolve the deep parts of me that I was being called to heal. This specific moon placement would call into action all of those lessons and bring them up for review in the form of a soul test.
To achieve a result you have never had you must do something you have never done
So in knowing this I did something different. I noticed my reaction and instead of sitting with it and replaying it over and over in my head- completely convoluting the scenario, I went to have a shower. I knew on many levels for me water is very cleansing and standing under the shower head visualizing the heated energy within me washing off and going down the drain is often highly effective for me. In this particular instance it did help me reground and return to the present moment- that was until I saw my partner.
As soon as I saw him the trigger was activated almost immediately and I knew there were more tests just on the horizon. I knew I had to be honest and clear with him what was going on. So I shared. At first it was pretty calm, but as we continued to talk and communication became more misunderstood I exploded.
Yup I had a full on ego-blow out. I couldn’t think straight, I couldn’t formulate sentences, I was overcome with intense feelings of rage and so instead of entering into world war 3 with my partner I let myself be guided to do something different.
I walked away from the conversation and told him I was going to meditate.
I grabbed my crystals (Angelite and candle quartz) and sat myself down. At this point I was trembling with upset and just made an agreement to sit with myself and my experience until it passed however long it took. I’m not exactly sure how long I sat in meditation. I sat there as tears rolled down my face- I thought that I had failed this soul test by having an ego eruption. As I sat with myself and called on my guides it became very clear to me that there was something greater going on beyond what I could currently see. As I made peace with the reality of the situation and accepted it for what it was the feeling of upset dissolved.
When I came out of meditation I picked up a book on soul lessons conveniently sitting beside me and flipped to a “random page” knowing that whatever page I landed on would be the perfect message for me to receive at that moment. I opened it to the soul lesson of: “Embrace Life’s Tests”– ummm how divinely perfect.
I read the lesson finding more and more peace with every word I read. As I completed the chapter I came into the awareness that I had actually passed the soul test. I had done something remarkably different in the face of conflict and upset. I had removed myself from the charged situation and immediately chose to invest myself into an action that would truly lead me out of where I was at.
When I returned to the living room nearly 40 minutes later something major had shifted. I apologized for my outburst, took responsibility for the fact I was triggered and then another miracle occurred. He softened, he told me he understood why it had triggered me and that next time he would be more aware of the words he was choosing to describe what had really happened. I felt understood. Then he acknowledged me for doing something different and handling the situation in a way I never had before. I felt appreciated. I felt loved.
Challenges expand our souls capacity for kindness, compassion and love
So you see friends we all have shit that hits the fan and it’s in these times of challenge/soul testing that we are given the opportunity to do something different to achieve a different result. It takes time. It takes practice. Our ego patterns are intense and deeply engrained in our behavioural patterns and it takes conscious awareness and a commitment on our part to begin to show up for ourselves differently.
Where ever you are, whatever you are facing, know you aren’t alone, know that you are capable of transcending whatever limitations are within you and that every challenge is a sign our souls are eager to grow and expand into our greatest potential. They arise so we can learn each time how to handle ourselves with more compassion, grace, kindness and love.
To you and all your delicious soul expansion ❤
Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!