***This post originated on my personal site a few weeks ago, since hitting some technical malfunctions I’m re-posting these holiday blogs here for continued accessibility over the holidays while we get everything back up and running on our main site*** … Continue reading
Holy shitballs I did it!!!
Successfully completed writing one self love blog post every day for an entire YEAR!!!! There are so many things I could write about today and I have given careful and thoughtful consideration for them all.
- I considered writing the highlights of the year.
- I considered writing the top lessons of the year.
- I considered not writing much at all- total honesty and transparency 😉
- I considered writing a simple celebratory post.
- I considered just writing another self love lesson.
- I considered sharing the impact of a year of self love on my relationship.
All of these were great however they didn’t feel quite right. Today is a significant day for me. For the past few years I have been levelling up and giving myself these “challenges” in order to grow and expand the person I know myself to be. This 365 Day RSL blog project was no exception.
To show up and create a blog post every day for an entire year took some serious commitment and dedication. It took bravery, honesty, transparency. It required me to face my shadow and deal with my shit. It called me to step into my role as a leader and a teacher and really own my place in the world. This project supported me in getting clear on who I am and what I am truly meant to be doing in the world. And it brought me face to face with my biggest supporter and my biggest nemesis- and coming to the profound realization that both happened to be me.
Today’s post I am going to share the biggest transformation that has taken place over the past year.
Unravelling The Ultimate Ego Sabotage Through Self Love
In one year I’ve done a hell of a lot of healing, forgiving, loving and moving forward.
But there was one thing that has held me back in all areas of my life and in the span of this project I was brought face to face with this disempowering mechanism. This is what I call “the ultimate ego sabotage” and I have had the opportunity to look it in the face with loving and kind eyes and find ways to gently and lovingly put it to rest.
That sabotage was an old familiar story of “not feeling like it”. How many times in my life have I used this line as a way to manipulate, get out of commitments and generally not show up for life? More than I can count.
Giving my word to a project of this magnitude brought me face to face with this disempowering habit every single day. Yes every single day it reared it’s face. Some days more than others but it always did.
My new self love habitual patterns were the only saving grace. If I had allowed my ego’s justifications or behaviours to run the show I would have quit. Something would have stopped me along the way. But because of my solid Radical Self Love foundation I was able to maintain my commitment even in the most challenging of times.
In my past my ego didn’t have to work very hard to get me to stop going down the path of transformation. It would pull the “oh I’m tired” excuse or something very similar and that would be enough of a reason to not show up for life.
As I grew and expanded my awareness my ego took to instigating physical pains in attempts to prevent me from showing up somewhere that would inevitably be a cause for my further transformation. The most memorable occurance of this function showed up a few years ago when I was heading out to be a production supervisor for the Advanced Course through Landmark Education. This role at the time called me to step up and lead a team of peeps and also create the space for all the people in the seminar to feel safe to dive into their own transformation- not an easy role by far. The morning of I was leaving my house and literally tripped over my own feet and fell down the steep stairs of my house. In the past this would have been enough for me to not show up- but I had done enough work to get acquainted with my ego that I knew it was just trying to take me out in any way possible to avoid my own immanent growth. Pretty bold stuff.
This year brought me into a whole new level of understanding my tricky ego. The function remains the same it’s just the measures and characteristics that change. Writing a self love blog every day for a year stretched me. Some days the words flowed, inspiration was at an all time high and some days it was fucking hard. I was emotional, my world was crashing around me and some how I managed to pull it together long enough to get real, get transparent and transform. In this year I have come to learn my ego’s new game is to take things incredibly personal.
I honestly at times couldn’t believe just how ridiculous I was being but somehow I couldn’t manage to stop it- that is until I realized this behaviour was a new form of my old ego friend. Once I became aware of this mechanism I was able to notice it’s take over sooner and become less reactive and more responsive to life.
This self love blog was ultimate training in playing bigger, creating something from nothing and standing for something way greater than myself. I knew my key to healing my heart was rooted in finding something I cared more about than the pain I was feeling. That “something” is this community, that “something” is supporting people in having more deliciously juicy relationships to themselves, to their lives and to the people in their lives. That “something” is self love.
In honour of achieving such a kick ass milestone I want to celebrate with some gifts to you all!
A FREE copy of my first RSL ebook- Sabotaged Love: The 12 Archetypes Keeping You From The Love You Want. This baby is launching into the world on July 17th. Everyone on our email list will receive a free copy of the book as a mega thank you for being here and co-creating such a magical community of love and transformation. You can sign up for our email list HERE
First dibs on attending my free summer webinar: The Self Loving Secrets To Long Lasting Commitment.
For more details drop me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org and I will send ya all the registration details! xo (eta end of July- Official date will be released within the next week).
Gift # 3:
Radical Self Love Coaching. For those of you who have been wanting to work with me to get your self love vibes thriving I’m rocking a summer coaching promo:
My 30 Minute RSL Reset five pack- (normally $444.00) until June 30th: $222.00 from July 1-30th: $333.00
To register for the 5 pack email me at email@example.com with subject line: RSL Celebration 5 Pack
30 Day RSL Intensive- For those of you looking for a more intensive self love coaching package I am offering 2 months of my 30 Day RSL Intensive for the price of one. You will receive two months of 1-1 coaching with me for $1111.00 and together we will design your sessions to fit and harmonize with your summer schedule and your needs. (Offer expires July 30th).
To register for the 30 Day Intensive send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org with subject line: 30 Day RSL Intensive Celebration Gift
I am so proud of what has been achieved in this past year and I am looking forward to this next year of bliss with all you lovers. A heads up, since the intention of this blog is complete I will be shifting over to my website for my regular blogging. Make sure to sign up to the email list to ensure you stay up to date on all things RSL!
I will likely post a couple more blogs here just to phase out and to share my new blogging schedule after I take a well deserved couple days off 😉
So much love to you all!!!! Thank you from the bottom of my heart for coming along for this journey! We’re only going up from here! xo
Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!
Vacations used to mean a free for all in my world- reckless abandon for my routines, health and well being. My late teens and early 20’s were seriously dedicated to being the life of the party and testing my body and mind to push to the limits of what was possible and healthy.
Having been consciously immersed into the world of Radical Self Love for the past year and a half my approach to vacations has dramatically shifted as well. Over the past year and a half I have come to really understand I love feeling good. My habits and routines are in place not to limit me or restrict me but to empower me into feeling good more of the time.
Eating really crappy food isn’t really much of a exciting thing anymore as my body reacts pretty intensely to large amounts of processed foods. Now this isn’t to say I never indulge. Of course I do- I just don’t over do it like I used to. Vacations used to be the time when I really would go over board and justify it to myself because hell, I was on vacation.
With my ever growing self confidence, self love and self value I’ve created a new way of vacationing for myself that clearly works and has me continue to rock out as my high vibin self.
How to keep up the self lovin on vacation
1. Pre planning.
A little planning goes a long way. In the case of this particular vacation the day before we left I was finishing up a 3.5 day juice cleanse. Knowing my body would have to be eased back into whole foods I made a declaration to our crew that I would be responsible for my own eats and then I did a little meal planning. I found a local natural/whole food market in one of the towns we drove through and stocked up on organic local produce and gentle whole foods that would compliment my cleanse and be easy to prepare.
Back in the day I likely would have had the same desire to eat clean but I would have been way to self conscious and insecure of voice my desires. What I learned this time around is no one else really cared that I wanted to do my own thing nor did anyone negatively question me. Because I owned it from a place of peace, inner alignment and love my positive inention was picked up by my peeps and respected.
2. Find the local gems.
Do a little research either before arriving or when you get there to suss out places that are in alignment with your lifestyle. Conveniently there is a raw, vegan, gluten free bakery literally down the street from where we are staying. We are in a seriously small town and I still managed to find an alternative that allows me to enjoy dessert just in a super healthy capacity. The gems are always around- it’s up to you to find them.
3. Stay active- just change it up.
My body is used to regular movement and exercise however often on vacation there isn’t a gym or yoga studio near by or accessible. Instead this morning I walked down to the lake set up on the dock, meditated for 30 minutes then followed it up with a 30 minute gentle yoga session. After breakfast I hit the hiking trails with my homies and rocked a mountain trail hike for 2 hours. There are always fun ways to get the body moving on vacation, swimming, playing, hiking, make shift yoga- the possibilities are there- it just takes you to open up to them.
4. Own what you need.
I run an online business, I LOVE writing. Just because I’m on vacation doesn’t mean I want to stop doing the things I derive value and joy from. I’m also not going to stop being of service to my community because I’m taking some time off. I set up my business to manage itself for the most part with just a few small check ins throughout my time away. I also communicate to the people I’ll be on vacation with, in advance, what my needs are. When I’m writing and being creative I’m really happy, which is why I do it every day- vacation is no exception. I don’t write because I have to I write because I love to. Big difference. To honour that which I love I just communicate to my peeps that each day at some point I’m going to sneak away for some solo creation time. I usually keep it to about an hour so I still have loads and heaps of time to play and enjoy the company of my amazing friends and family.
5. Enjoy life.
Yes yes yes! Vacations are meant to be fun and to fulfill the purpose of enjoying yourself. Enjoyment means different things to different people so get clear on what things make you super happy to do while you are on vacation and then just do them. I love listening to great music, writing, reading, swimming, tanning, running in nature, hiking, cooking, lounging, watching movies when it rains, eat ice cream, drink really really good vino, laughing, playing cards, creating something new, being a positive contribution to the local community- the list goes on and on. The point is to get to know you so you know exactly what enjoying life looks like and feels like to you!
Ultimately vacations can be an opportunity to further the self love vibes and keep those feel good practices in full swing. You are always the conscious creator of your experience and how things go really depend on one thing- YOU. Get clear on what you need to feel great and what you want to do and experience during your vacation, then communicate this information as clearly as you can to the people around you. Standing in your truth is one of the greatest acts of self love we could ever learn to do on the regular. The great thing is when you have surrounded yourself with the right people, honouring your needs will completely resonate with them and may just inspire them to invite more self lovin into their lives 😉
Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!
p.s. Stay tuned for our completion of the 365 Radical Self Love Project tomorrow!! I have a couple gifts to offer as a massive celebration of such an incredible milestone!!! Check in tomorrow to see all the goodness! xoxo
There is a general vibe floating through the air these days in the RSL community.
Stories of breakups, heartache and intense emotional upheaval seem to be subtly crossing my path lately. I sure have been through my fare share of all of these this past year and a half I wanted to shed some inspired light on navigating this tender territory from a place of self love.
3 Self Loving Steps To Gracefully Navigate Emotional Storms
1. Give yourself permission to be feeling what you are feeling.
It’s actually ok to be experiencing whatever you are. Happy, sad, upset, angry- whatever has made it’s presence known in your experience, is there for a reason. If we avoid, deny or try to stuff down this “stuff” it just builds more momentum and comes bursting out uncontrollably at a later date. Giving ourselves permission to be is one of the most freeing things we can ever do for our healing, growth and spiritual evolution.
A wonderful RSL mantra: “I give myself permission to be human and experience all emotions knowing each serves a divine and perfect purpose.”
2. Come into full acceptance of your emotions when they arise.
A really magical thing happens when we come into acceptance- diffusion. When we give ourselves permission (step 1) then accept the emotional experience we are having as its happening- the duration of the upset is significantly reduced. Now all emotional upheavals and storms will be unique and some may last longer than others and that’s totally ok. The point is to remind yourself it is perfectly ok to be experiencing what you are.
A really great RSL mantra I use when emotions arise is this: “At this present moment I am having an experience of (I then identify the experience as best I can- anger, jealousy, sadness, loneliness- whatever it is give it a name), it is ok that I am having this experience as having it means I am growing and expanding who I am, I accept this experience and trust I will receive the value of what it is here to teach me.” Then…
3. Allow, allow, allow.
Your emotions need an avenue to clear themselves, period. It is at this stage where you also encounter the divine assignment of practicing personal responsibility. Just because you’re having an emotional storm doesn’t mean everyone around you needs to be pulled into the emotional hurricane too. Find responsible and respectful (to yourself and others) outlets to allow the emotion to pass. Like all storms it will and the more you resist it the longer and more intense it will get.
If I am in a situation where the clearing will negatively impact another I make a promise and pact with myself to allow the emotion passage to happen at a specific time and place in the very near future- then keep my word to myself. If I am in a space where no one will be negatively impacted I just allow the clearing to happen in the moment. To consciously make this distinction will require self awareness and self loving discipline, which in all honesty just takes a bit of practice to polish.
Some of the things I do to allow the clearing:
- Crying (I’m a Cancer and this is the most effective method for me)
- High intensity exercise
- Screaming into a pillow
- Punching a pillow or punching bag
- Lions breath
- Real talk journalling
- Verbal clearing (done only in a professional context with a coach)
- And my ultimate fav, because it inevitably cracks me up is: stomping around and over dramatizing- think 2 year old temper tantrum 😉
All of these prove to be quite effective and in my allowing of the emotion to pass through, without additional internal judgement (“Oh I shouldn’t do this, I shouldn’t be feeling this”) I am able to return to a state of clarity and calmness relatively quickly- in the grand scheme of things.
Part of the Radical Self Love journey is learning how to be ok with all aspects of your human experience. Learning how to bless these types of “negative” experiences and extract the gold always lying deep within, has certainly been one of the most fulfilling aspects of my Radical Self Love journey to date.
Give yourself permission, own the experience, allow the storm to fill you up and then allow it to pass on through. What you will begin to notice, with regular practice is, the duration and intensity of each emotional upheaval lightens as you become stronger in your application of these three graceful steps.
When we spend less time, energy and emotion in the stormy storms we free ourselves up to play and radiate in the blissful moments and experiences our lives are meant to bring.
Where ever you are is perfect, what ever you’re feeling is perfect, you are perfect just as you are. Remember that.
Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!
It’s Fathers Day and I couldn’t be happier to celebrate my amazing poppa bear.
In honour of his amazing influence on my life tonight I will share with you all some of the most precious things my Dad has taught me throughout my life.
The 6 Most Precious Values My Dad Has Taught Me
The value of being happy-
My Dad is one of the most jolly people I know. He is always the first to crack a joke, pull a prank and just laugh at life. This has often reminded me when I get too serious (which in all honesty is pretty regular) to lighten up, laugh and find the humour in life.
The value of being dedicated-
My entire life I watched my Dad infuse all the work he’s ever done with such intention and dedication. He shows up and shows up 100%. I remember when he was my soccer coach in the seven years he coached me and my team he never once missed a practice or a game. He honoured all of our time and effort by being on time, ending on time and showing up every time, even when I’m sure he didn’t feel like it. This dedication has impacted me more than he may ever know. I learned from a very early age to do my best to respect others time and energy and when I say I’m going to do something- do it. A profound life lesson.
The value of doing complete work-
I certainly have acquired my fathers passion for order and meticulous action. I am most at peace when everything matches, is in it’s place and nicely organized. This quality brings a certain peace to my life and truly makes things a whole heck of a lot more workable.
The value of acceptance-
This is a tough lesson for a lot of people, myself included. Having my Dad as a role model enabled me to more easily come to terms with the fact that in life there are things we can’t change and circumstances we can’t control. We can either fight against these conditions, resist them or come into a peaceful acceptance. I truly believe through his example is where I came up with this knowing that “everything that happens is the perfect thing to happen”. This particular motto has helped me immensely when in situations that didn’t go the way I expected or sometimes wanted.
The value of love-
No matter what I’ve done or how I have behaved my Dad has loved me. There has never once been a moment where I questioned his love or believed it wasn’t there. I’ve come to learn we all express and receive love in different capacities and once I figured this out I was even more present to the abundant love and support my father has for me and my brother.
The value of following your heart-
My Dad has been a living breathing example of taking the biggest risk of all- following the path of your dreams. I have learned that this path is often challenging as we face many internal and sometimes external obstacles on the route to fulfilling our hearts desires- but the value of his example resides in not being stopped by this fact. I learned by watching my Dad it was safe to pursue my passions and to follow my heart- knowing that it might not work out but to at least give it a go. No regrets.
I am so deeply blessed to have such an incredible man for a father, someone who has taught me so much and inspired me to go for my dreams and live a life I am truly worthy of. I look forward to all the many years ahead to learn from him and continue to build upon this truly beautiful relationship I have the honour and privilege of sharing with my poppa. Love my Dad so very much!
To all the amazing fathers out there I celebrate you in my heart today. Thank you for all you do. You are loved.
Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!
In this 45 minute interview I will cover the basics of Radical Self Love and the one fundamental piece new moms can put in place to honour what they need and fill up their self love tanks.
Why is self love so important for moms?
As women we are natural nurturers, the challenge is, most of us have been brought up in a culture that trains us to take care of everyone else before ourselves. When we do this we deplete our energy reserves and quickly become disconnected from our higher selves.
Moms have one of the most sacred callings in this human form- the responsibility of nurturing new life. When our needs as women are met, we feel full, as balanced as possible and taken care of a profound grounding radiates from our being. It is this gift of presence and deep inner calm which has the potential to be transferred into future generations through our own activation of it.
The impact of raising new generations with this new state of awareness is HUGE. We have the opportunity to anchor massive transformation into the history books when we begin to teach our future generations- through our example- that our happiness resides within and we must highly prioritize our own wellbeing- which is where Radical Self Love comes into the mix.
Being a mom is a full time responsibility and in our 45 minute interview we will shed some light on how we can maintain our connections to ourselves, embrace the new role as mom and at the same time radiate love, nurturing and conscious awareness towards the little humans we have the honour of raising.
It’s going to be a fabulous event and the best part?! It’s FREE!
I am honoured to be speaking to all the mommas-to-be and the all the super hero moms out there who like the idea of self love and are looking for some tips on how to apply it in a practical and workable way.
If you are a mom, new mom or about to be a mom join us for this FREE Global event!
Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!
My wifey/co-host of the The Awesomeness Advantage shmabigail returned back to Van today and I couldn’t be more thrilled and excited to spend the next week frolicking and adventuring just like we did back in the day!!!
In honour of this very special occasion I will share with you two really RAD Awesomeness Advantage episodes
First Share: Lessons in having a positive self image
Second Share: Musings on self care and self worth
And if you just want a good giggle check out these gems:
Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!
Today wraps up my time in Victoria.
The past three days have been jammed full of creative expression, full on creation, cleansing and so much love.
I chose to do a gentle juice cleanse while I was recording for a few reasons.
- When I’m juicing I feel so much lighter and brighter. This is optimal when going into a state of creation. To feel bright and clear makes the entire process that much more enjoyable.
- Additionally it fills me up with raw life force energy, which is the pure energy of love. When I’m juicing I find it quite easy to dip into deep states of meditation and I am much jollier. Gratitude radiates out of me and I go with the flow so much more.
- I also have a stable levels of energy which is really required when doing work of this nature because it is so energetically consuming.
In this state of super high vibes I am in very clear alignment with my creativity. Which makes recording music a lot easier and enjoyable.
In all my years of writing and recording music this by far was the most incredible and enjoyable process. I just got to be in my flow and the results speak for themselves. Without the pressures of “perfection” I could relax, get into alignment and allow the musical magic to flow through.
I spent about 5 hours in total recording both songs. I recorded the guitar, main vocals and background vocals for both and to do so in such a short amount of time seriously impressed me. We spent today in post production land mixing and putting the finishing touches on both of the tunes- and I am so pumped with how they turned out.
I headed out to a meeting just as the songs were being finished and when I came back to listen to the final product I was blown away. So freaking pumped and honestly really proud of myself and the amazing job I did. Listening to the guitar I was really impressed with how good it sounds and gave myself some serious credit for how far I’ve come in my playing in the past 6 years.
All in all this trip was exactly what my soul needed. I cleansed out the body, opened up to massive amounts of creative energy and allowed love in in a major way. The time I was so blessed to spend with my family, warmed my heart and spiked my energy even higher.
As I return home today I am tired but feel so damn alive and in alignment. So very excited for the next chapter of this crazy awesome adventure called my life 😉
Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!
After a very successful day 2 of recording we celebrated by doing a family dinner with our Vic crew.
The evening kicked off with a trip to the Sidney Market where we got to soak up all the local goodness.
The crew made a fabulous dinner. I had the honour of having some soul to soul chats with my brothers, celebrating in each other’s successes, listening to some new musical creations and meeting new friends.
It was so good for my soul to have this much needed family reconnection time, share some big hearty laughs and be reminded of how incredible our family tribe truly is.
Feeling good, feeling full on life, feeling so deeply grateful!
Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!
I am over joyed and deeply moved with the outpouring of love and support from my communities within the last 24hrs.
Since publishing my post last night I’ve been flooded with positive feedback, incredible stories of courage, people relating and taking inspired and brave actions in their own lives. All of this possibility, transformation and love because of one extremely raw and authentic post.
Releasing that blog post was one of the best moves I’ve ever made.
It activated people in a big time way.
It touched hearts.
It opened minds.
It widened the capacity for compassion and forgiveness.
It evoked strong emotional reactions.
It caused the activation and expression of truth.
It gave the beautiful souls in this community the space to tell the truth on themselves.
It was shared- a lot.
This is not a coincidence. This is what happens when love leads the way. The activity and incredible feedback I have received in the past 24 hrs sparked within me a massive jolt of creativity, confidence and increased my capacity and willingness to be real and be seen.
Writing that piece wasn’t easy and releasing it out into the world brought up a lot of resistance- but the benefit I’ve seen in such a short time makes up for any initial uneasiness.
So Im stepping up.
I’m playing bigger.
I am willingly submitting my work to additional platforms and allowing this to take me where I am meant to go.
I am going full stop into my passion- supporting peeps in repairing the #1 relationship in their lives (the one with themselves) and support these lovers in rocking their romantic relationships through the vehicle of Radical Self Love.
This past year has been literally life changing and I’m stepping into it all. I’ve been cracked wide open and I’m ready and willing to step beyond my limitations and play like I never have.
We’re getting really real and really rad for this next year of RSL.
Love you all so dearly. Thank you for standing for love in the world. Thank you for being you. Thank you for showing up and thank you for your willingness to radiate love consciousness into the world. Even if we’ve never met you have contributed to my life in such a deep and profound way, for this I am eternally grateful and I won’t stop going deeper and expanding higher. I’m open, ready and willing to release the aspects of my ego archetypes that keep me from being fully lit up, self expressed and self loving.
You all have made this journey so fulfilling and I bow in humble gratitude to your brilliance. Lets do this lovers! xo
Radical Self Love to the MAX!!!
If you are ready to release ego archetypes in your relationships and level up in love’s radiance, sign up HERE to our mailing list to receive a FREE copy of my first ebook “Sabotaged Love- The 12 Archetypes Keeping You From The Love You Want” coming in July!!!