5 Essential Steps to Successful Vulnerable (aka REAL) Conversations Day 58: 365 RSL Project

small-love-photography-inspirationsWhen diving into the world of vulnerability and the fragile nature of human emotions it is wise to set out on this expedition from a space of awareness and mindfulness.

There are some fundamental keys to having successful authentic and vulnerable conversations. I was reminded of these during my road trip this morning with my partner.

 

1. Honour the path of the other person. Just because you may want an answer right now, the other person may not be in the right space to share. The best way to create the environment for this is to ask a simple question before diving into any emotionally vulnerable conversation. “I have a question to ask you about something personal is now a good time”? “Are you open to having a chat about _____”? If the other person says no, request they let you know when they are open to having that question, then drop it. Yes. Drop it completely. Pushing a conversation of this magnitude will never end well. For your peace of mind, their peace of mind and each of your emotional wellbeing allow the conversation to happen when its meant to, not when you think it should.

2. Being vulnerable in every way shape and form is generally a challenging thing for most. Even the most practiced individuals can get charged up, triggered and confronted by such conversations especially when the convo activates a deep seated wound we have not yet healed. If you are wanting to have this type of conversation you will need to embody compassion and express your vulnerability first and foremost. No one likes being put on the spot. So open and create the space for authentic sharing by putting your butt on the line first by sharing something that makes you really feel into the experience of vulnerability.

3.Do not take things personally. When others are speaking their truth they may not say what you want them to say and in the way you want them to say it. Allow them to speak their truth to the best of their capabilities for the time being.

4. If you do get triggered and take things personally pause the conversation until you can come at it from a place of love and neutrality. To do this practice your ability to forgive. Forgive yourself and the other person for whatever transpired and let it go.

5. Always be love. Plain and simple. Before saying anything ask yourself “Is what I’m about to say what love would say right now”? If the answer is yes go ahead and say it and only allow the things aligned with love to come out. This will take a high amount of self control and self awareness. As a Radical Self Love lover I know you can do this 😉

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Anytime all five of these steps are practiced, the outcome is an amazing heart opening conversation which leads both parties to a deeper understanding of themselves and each other. Radical Self Love is about generating win/wins and leaving all parties with an experience of loves true essence.

Go be love today and see what opens up 😉

Radical Self Love to the Max!!

Kels

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2 thoughts on “5 Essential Steps to Successful Vulnerable (aka REAL) Conversations Day 58: 365 RSL Project

  1. Such perfect timing. Today I was with my husbands cousins and I started talking about how my beliefs have changed and how great I feel, the books I’ve read, the retreats I’ve gone on to confirm my beliefs. One person was terrified of dying so I said what I’ve believed in for years how wonderful it is on the other side and this lead to a bit of a discussion. I came home feeling I’m the outcast now in the family. You are the first thing I turned to tonight with wonderful words that helped me see what I did. Thank you again.

    • Awe Marcia! This is such an incredible share! I truly acknowledge you for having the courage to share your truth even when people don’t ‘get it’. Truly inspirational!! Thank you for sharing and brightening my day with your vulnerability and radical self love! Much love,
      Kels

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